i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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