Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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