she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
