you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Holy sore nipples Batman
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Randomize
