I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
