going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
You're like the curious george of whores
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
