You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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