She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
