I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
