My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
You may now shotgun with the bride
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
