yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
