I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
