I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
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