I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
