I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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