Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize