Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Randomize