so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
We talked him into tasing himself.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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