I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
