I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
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once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
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Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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