Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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