hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Randomize
