...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize
