WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Randomize
