dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
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