Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
