Kareoke will never be a sober sport
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
