Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize