He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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