Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Randomize
