kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
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