I wannas sexs uuuuu
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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