OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Randomize
