Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?