$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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