I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait