i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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