Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Randomize
