Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Randomize
