i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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