Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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