I need help removing her.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize