just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize