So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
