I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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