Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Randomize
