He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
