I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
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