But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
