I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
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